Thursday, March 6, 2008

Back in the Day...Part Eleven

OK, it's already part eleven and I haven't even gotten to April, 1999. I'm going to start speeding it up a little, so pay attention!

Our son, Dawson, arrived on April 22, 1999. I'd love to say that unlike the first 16 weeks of pregnancy, everything went awesome. But it didn't. Dawson's umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck so tightly that he was blue when he came out. Thankfully he was fine, but it was an intensely stressful situation. After a day in the hospital, they had some concerns about his health. They did a spinal tap, he had to wear a heart monitor, etc. etc. It turns out that he was fine.

I got home and became ill...like 104 degree temperature ill. After an ultrasound at the doctor's office they sent me back to the hospital for further observation. I was there and made no progress. After many doctors and many drugs and many days they did another ultrasound. It was then that they discovered that part of the placenta was left inside me. After surgery I was as good as new. (For those of you who have read Vince's book, it was during this time that the whole "Hold Me Jesus" story happened.) (By the way, if you haven't read his book, you should. It's so awesome. And I'm not just saying it because I'm supposed to. It's seriously amazing.)

I didn't realize how spoiled we were before we had kids. Starting a church and being involved in a new church is crazy. Adding a kid to the equation makes it even crazier. I used to think we were busy. Once Dawson joined the family, I realized that I wasn't nearly as busy as I thought. Once you add a little one to the picture everything becomes blurred.

In my opinion, the firstborn child is always the most stressful. Being a new mom, you have no idea what you are doing. In my case, everything was a big production, from feeding, bathing and sleeping to changing diapers, running errands and trying to stay sane. I went back to work part-time after 8 weeks. I worked in the office for 10 hours and at home for 10 hours a week. While I was at the office, Vince stayed with Dawson. There's nothing like pumping breast milk in your office or having your husband call you in a panic screaming, "What do I do?????" Good times...good times!

My focus was on Dawson and definitely not on Forefront. I think it's important for moms in the church planting world to give themselves a break. We put so much pressure on ourselves and our families. We act like the survival of the church rests on our shoulders. Thankfully it doesn't!

Remember that your main ministry is to your husband and children. Enjoy your time at home with your them. Different seasons of life will come. You won't be stuck at home with little ones forever. Enjoy it while you're there!

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4 comments:

Lisa said...

That is so reassuring, Jen! I have 2 little girls (5 and 2-years-old) and my husband is going to be the site pastor for a multi-site church in Sierra Vista, Arizona. I really struggle with balancing being involved in the church launch and taking care of the girls. I feel guilty (MY false perception of others' expectations of me) if I miss something "important" because of nap, early bedtime or other child-focused need. My husband, fortunately, is my champion in this area. You are right... our family is our most important ministry. I need to try to remember that everyday! :)

cartersvillefamily said...

Thanks for the stories over the past weeks. I myself am a church planters wife and having young kids is hard. I do realize that this is only a season of life and I won't have to miss out on all the evening events forever. Thanks for the encouragement. It's good to know that there are others like me out there.
Jennie Lukaszewski
cartersvillefamily.wordpress.com

Jen said...

Sometimes putting your family before the church can be aggrivating. Like when you have to miss "important" church things because of your kids. Or when you have to step out of a meeting to breastfeed. But we have to keep in mind that it is BEST. Even though it might not feel like the right thing to do, it is! Keep up the sacrifice, Girls! It's totally worth it. Your family comes first!

rachel larkin said...

Wow, that is amazing! I am so glad to hear this now. We are just starting with the church planting thing and I have already wrestled with this. My husband is great at always having me keep our family first! This is just reassuring, even though sometimes it's "aggravating"...deep down I know it's best! thanks again :)